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Week Six Story: An Unlucky Merchant

 Sindbad by Andrew Lang

He awoke with a jolt. Today was the day dad was going to let him help with the valley of diamonds. It is said to be the most beautiful valley of all the lands, especially this disappointingly boring island. The valley is said to have the most elegant diamonds. Diamonds that range in size from a pinky toe nail to a fist. Diamonds that are so shiny you could see yourself in the reflection. He could not wait. His father had even told him if the bird brought back diamonds from his throw, he got to keep it. Can you imagine having that kind of wealth? He ran down stairs to his waiting father. But, he was not as excited for him. His father sat him down and had a stern talk with him.

"Son, I know that you are excited, but there are some safety precautions that we have to go over. There are snakes in the valley. They typically hide at night. That is why we go first thing in the morning. So we can put as much distance as possible between us and them by nightfall. But, that does not mean there are not lingerers. These snakes are not like the garden snakes you are used to. They will eat you in one bite and they will not hesitate. If you see one, you run. You understand?" he said with concern written all over his face.

"I understand dad. I will be safe, I promise" he said trying to hide the excitement that was flowing through his body.

It was time. They packed the car and they left. The raw meat didn't leave the car smelling too fresh. It took everything he had not to throw up in the car, either because of the smell or the fact that his dad was going 60 on the curviest roads on the island. 

When they arrived, he grabbed the cooler immediately out of the car. He listened to the same safety talk that his father had been giving him every year since he was born. But he was finally handed the launcher. He walked up to the edge of the valley and threw his bait over the side. Then, he rushed over to the birds nest. With a squawk, he watched the bird take flight out of the valley with his bait pressed in his claws. It was a good grasp, he was bound to have at least 4-5 diamonds. When the bird landed, he shooed him away with a few loud noises. When he rushed to the nest to move the meat, he didn't find diamonds. He didn't even find snakes. It was a man. What good was this guy? 



Depiction of the Valley of Diamonds, Source: WikiMedia

Author's Note:

Sindbad got off the boat on an island. He was taking a relaxing nap because the wine he had brought had made him sleepy. When he awoke, he saw the ship sailing across the horizon. He tried to climb a rock but he discovered it was an egg. With a screech, a giant bird began his descent towards him. While the bird was landed, Sindbad tied himself to his leg. When the bird took off, Sindbad went with him. Once he landed again, he untied quickly. It was a valley covered in diamonds, but for every diamond was a snake twice his size. The merchants, would throw raw meat over the side of the valley so when the birds would swoop to get the meat, they would pick up the diamonds too. Sindbad thought he could be the same thing. So, he attached himself to the meat. Whenever the bird landed and was shooed away, it was only Sindbad that remained and the merchant's were very upset. 

Comments

  1. It definitely took me a second to realize how your story and your author's note connected but now that I get it, I really really it! I think this was a really unique way to retell a story, it took me a second to connect the man at the end of your story to Sindbad. That was also a little comical, a boy expecting to see diamonds but instead it's strange man at his feet.

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  2. I really like your style of writing. I like how you compared size of the diamond to a pinky toe nail. That was a more unusual and interesting comparison. I was not expecting that. I like how you added that it was a man rather than diamonds. I found that to be clever. Great story!

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  3. I like your retelling of the story! At first I couldn't tell where it was going, but then it started to feel familiar and I remembered the background. Your author's not also helped me make the connection. Retelling stories from the perspective of another character is always my favorite way to do it. I think it would be interesting to have kept the tale going a little longer and give the reaction of the boy's dad as well!

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